Dahlia DeWinters - Author

Quirky Heroines, Happy Endings

Horror Movie Review – Wrecker

Title: Wrecker
Genre: Horror
Director: Michael Bafaro
IMDB link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt4227282/

This movie almost WRECKED my marriage.  (See what I did there?) My husband had the day off and I suggested we watch a movie.

“Hey, we’ll watch this movie. It’s terrible, but it’ll be fun! We’ll have a few laughs!”

Famous last words.

I’ve seen some horror dreck in my lifetime. I’ve watched the Friday the 13th movies and stuff that I can’t even recall I’ve seen because it’s been so terrible. But I’ve been able to laugh and point and giggle about the director and/or writer being awful. Or awful acting. Sometimes, the movie is bad, but you can see the actors are having fun, so it makes up for it.

This was not the case with this movie. This movie was just bad with no redeeming qualities. None. Wait. I did love the red Mustang and some of the shots were gorgeous. I can say that. But I don’t watch a horror for its gorgeous shots. Really, I don’t.

Let me give you a little overview. Being a woman of a certain age, I have seen a ton of movies. I know most of the tricks, the cliches and the character tropes. And I deal with them, because, let’s be honest, there is nothing new under the sun. And that’s okay.

You know what’s not okay? This movie.

So it starts out, some cross country trip. Blonde girl is nice, brunette is nasty. She’s

drinking, pretending to smoke (As an ex smoker, I can tell a true inhale. You gotta savor that smoke to get that nicotine hit), flashing her boobs, etc. Meanwhile the driver, the good girl blonde is telling her to calm down. Okay, look, blondie, you knew your girl was out of control before she got in the car, so why all the peeved admonishments?

Side note:  The poster?  Where it says ‘you stop, you die’.  They stopped plenty of times and no matter how much I wished……well.  Movie poster is a liar.

Anyway, they somehow anger some random tow truck driver and he starts messing with them. I would go on, but even thinking about the movie makes me tired.  Suffice it to say many stupid things happen and then it’s over.

Another side note:  This second poster?  Talking about ‘a wrong turn’?  This is also  a lie.  They took a shortcut ON PURPOSE.

I’ve seen Duel. I’ve seen Joyride. Both were way better and Duel was made in the EARLY seventies. In Wrecker, the acting is terrible. The choices the characters make are ridiculous and make no sense. And…the whole movie had my face screwed up.

My husband was not pleased. What a waste of 70 odd minutes.

Avoid. Avoid. Avoid.

Grade: F
Watch or not to watch?: Don’t bother. It’s not even bad enough to have fun with.

Blogtoberfest – 10 Scary Movies in Black and White

Let’s be honest.  Given the huge number of gross-out, slash ‘em up films that are under “horror movie” genre, watching someone get stabbed, or hung or cut apart gets a little tedious. Blood and guts can be scary, yes, but the real “horror” is sometimes only in our minds:  the stuff we can’t see, or even worse, the stuff we imagine we see.

 

Following this, and based upon a comment from one of my Facebook friends, I compiled a list of horror/scary movies in black and white that you may enjoy.  Where possible, I’ve placed the date and time it’s on the air, but otherwise, I’m sure you can find them on either a streaming service or even on YouTube.

 

When I was a seventies child, these movies were perfect for a rainy Saturday or Sunday afternoon, and were scary enough to keep you awake with some nightmares for sure!  So without further ado, here’s my list.

 

  1. The Thing from Another World (1951) – I actually didn’t see this movie until I was an adult, and while it wasn’t super scary, it really creeped me out.  James Arness is the “Thing” and at his height of 6’6” he was able to tower menacingly over the rest of the cast. A must watch for classic movie lovers. Available on archive.org.

     

  2. The Invisible Man (1933) – Long before Hollow Man with Kevin Bacon, there was Claude Rains as the Invisible Man.  This was Rains’s American film debut. Available on vimeo.

     

  3. Cat People (1942) – Built around a woman who is cursed to turn into a panther, this movie is said to be the origin of the “jump scare”.  It’s a moody, atmospheric piece that is both well-acted and well-written.

     

  4. The Incredible Shrinking Man (1957) –  The screenplay was written by Richard Matheson, based upon his novel of the same name.  Exposed to both pesticides and radiation (poor fellow), the title character begins shrinking and no one can help him.  I remember the battle with the cat as well as another “monster” that I won’t mention here.

     

  5. House on Haunted Hill (1959) – The setup is simple. A millionaire offers 10k to be locked in a haunted house (presumably also located on a haunted hill) overnight.  Seems simple right? But the house may have other plaaaaaans. It stars Vincent Price, which should be enough to compel you to watch it. Available on TubiTv.

     

  6. Them! (1954) – Ants affected by none other than atomic testing, invade a New Mexico town with disastrous results. Great giant monster movie!

     

  7. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931) – Starring Frederic March. You know the drill. Available on archive.org.
  8. The Uninvited (1944) – If you’re a fan of haunted house/ghost stories, then this film starring Ray Milland (of Dial M for Murder) is for you. Slow, creeping horror.

     

  9. The Night of the Hunter (1955) – More Gothic horror than supernatural horror, The Night of the Hunter is full of dread and gloom, enhanced by its stark black and white presentation.  Robert Mitchum is the supposedly “God-fearing” preacher with LOVE and HATE tattooed on his knuckles. Scary and picturesque.

     

  10. Night of the Living Dead (1968) – No B&W horror movie list would be complete this super classic.  Watch online here.

Horror Movie Review – Jack in the Box

Jack in the Box Movie Poster

Title:   Jack in the Box (2019)

Synopsis:

When a vintage Jack-in-the-box is un-earthed and opened, its new owners soon have reason to believe the creepy clown doll within has a life of its own. (from imdb.com)

Genre: Horror

Opinion:

The creepy clown doll has more life than this movie.  Not recommended. Read on to find out why.

The movie opens with an older fellow in a field with a metal detector.  We horror movie veterans know he’s going to find something he shouldn’t which is going to wreak havoc for the rest of the movie. What does he find?  Well, true horror fans, you’ll be pleased to know he finds the creepiest Jack in the Box ever.  Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m not a fan of things that jump out of boxes, and this clown is super creepy.  But let’s face it folks if it weren’t so scary looking then it wouldn’t be a horror movie now would it?  

This opening sequence has very little dialogue but it does have a lot of action and right off the bat we’re privy to what the occupant of the box actually does.  I like when horror movies like this do that. It lets the audience know what to expect from the movie monster and all we’re doing is watching to see who gets it first and how. 

The  movie’s protagonist is some milquetoast dude named Casey and he is supposedly an American. But I will tell you this, he neither looks nor acts like any American I’ve ever seen in any horror movie ever.   While I suspect the actor himself is not American I’m not going to quibble about their casting choice.   the real movie opens 12 years later after the opening sequence in a Toy Museum.  apparently the Jack-in-the-Box has found its way there and sits in the storeroom just waiting to claim its next victim. 

Note:  The box has four letters along the top and when it is first revealed the letters spell DYBK (I think, I couldn’t be arsed to rewind, so if I’m wrong let me know in the comments), which immediately made me think of the Dybbuk box.  Just a side note to show how horribly detail oriented I am.  Also, how less than impressed I was with the acting.

After the movie gets going with a bit of character development and backstory, we find out the history of the Jack in the box, which I thought was rather interesting.  I love the “expert”: a black dude who comes in, gives his lines, and disappears into the “night”.  Very cool part. (Also, he wasn’t around to die.)

I went along with the ride of the movie until about a half hour in, then I became annoyed.  There was a lack of …..time passage?  I didn’t know how much time passed between scenes. Characters appeared and disappeared without explanation. The main example of this is the woman who worked at the toy museum before Casey got there.  She hangs around long enough for the story to get started, then she’s just….gone.  She does come back later in the movie, but it’s just odd the way the movie rolls out. 

Through the obligatory internet search, we find out about the Jack in the Box and the evil contained within.  

What I also found interesting about this movie was the number of people who took the time to pause, stare, and speak to this creepy looking exhibit.  Plus, though they seemed to be put off by it, they had no problem insulting it!  Personally, I see something like that, I’m walking right by that mess. 

All in all it’s not a great movie.  I watched the rest of it just to see how things turned out, but as I mentioned, I had checked out thirty minutes in. 

After much ado, I did finish it.  Sigh.  Unfortunately, good premise,but poor execution.  In fact, on some levels it was rather boring.  There was some stabbing, some yelling and some Latin. I’m telling you, I was so done with this film, I didn’t even bother to rewind to hear the Latin words.  I….didn’t care. 

Questions and quibbles:

  1.  What was the point of the protagonist being from America?  Except for a visit to an American-type diner, this wasn’t mentioned at all. He just as well could have been from France or Canada or Mexico.  Also, they never mentioned a state….just “America”.

  2. In the diner, the glasses of soda they are served have no ice and the glasses are dirty. Also, the straws are already unwrapped and put in the glass.  Yuk.

  3. Most of the women did not carry purses.  I’m sorry, but it’s super rare to see a woman without a purse or a fanny pack or something. (Yes, it’s a small detail, which is why it’s a quibble, LOL)

  4. The protagonist’s backstory was like….wut?  It didn’t set him up as sympathetic.

I will say the special effects/costuming of the monster clown was effective and creepy.  They did put a lot of work into it and it was done very well. 

That’s all folks.  I’m sorry this movie wasn’t good and wasn’t bad enough to be fun.  It was tedious, illogical, and seemed strung together.  Again, great premise, poor execution.  The script needed a lot of work.

Horror Movie Review – Hell House, LLC

Title:   Hell House, LLC (2015)

Synopsis:
Five years after an unexplained malfunction causes the death of 15 tour-goers and staff on the opening night of a Halloween haunted house tour, a documentary crew travels back to the scene of the tragedy to find out what really happened. (from imdb.com)

Genre: Horror, Thriller

Opinion

Well, well, well. The found footage genre isn’t completely dead.

If you’re a friend of mine on social media, you should well know I’ve never met a found footage film I didn’t like. Well, scrap that, because I realized, yes, I’ve met a few I didn’t care for at all. However, I am fascinated by the whole genre of found footage horror films and never pass up a chance to screen them….if I can take it. Some I won’t see because the gross factor is too high. But that’s blog post for another day.

Hell House, LLC is a little gem I found hiding on Amazon Video. Sidenote- I got the prime membership just for the shipping, but the Video area is kind of like your favorite Palmer Video. I’ve been finding quite a few cool films included with my Prime membership. Back to the movie.

The premise is quite simple: A group of friends put on haunted houses each Halloween season in New York City. This season, they decide to rent an old hotel. The Abbadon hotel in Abbadon, New York. Now, I’m pretty genre savvy, so I knew that Abbadon meant something or other, but was too lazy to reach for my phone to look it up. No matter, because I simply like watching the story unfold before my eyes. Why do research when surely the filmmakers will do it for me?

As a found footage film, this is one of the better ones. There’s not a ton of shaky cam or people yelling profanity at the camera, which is good. The movie opens telling us of an incident that happened five years prior, where people were killed/injured at the opening of the haunted house. It then circles back to before the incident, where the haunted house was being set up.

I must say, this film offered me quite a few scares from places I didn’t expect and had me covering my eyes at one point. It’s fun and it holds together, pretty much, plot wise. There is very little blood/gore – it’s not a slasher film, but I tell you, it’s creepy enough that I remember some of the scenes from it a few weeks later.

Recommended – have fun!

Rating – B

 

Horror Movie Review -Train to Busan (Busanhaeng)

Title: Train to Busan  – Busanhaeng (original title)
Genre: Horror (Zombies), Thriller, Drama
Director: Sang-Ho Yeon
Writers: Sang-Ho Yeon
IMDB Link:  http://www.imdb.com/title/tt5700672/

NO SPOILERS

Me after seeing this movie on Amazon Video:

 

PLOT SYNOPSIS: (imdb.com) While a zombie-virus breaks out in South Korea, a couple of passengers struggle to survive on the train from Seoul to Busan.

Before I even begin, I’m going to say I loved this movie.  A lot.  

Many horror movie viewers are cynical and jaded.  They claim that “they’ve seen it all” and “nothing can scare them now”.  That’s all well and good, but once you claim that, where is the fun in watching movies?  Movies are escapist creations, much like many fiction books.  The point of any given movie is to immerse yourself in the experience, and in a manner of speaking, let the filmmaker have his way with you.

As a film viewer of the age that I am at now.  (Don’t you love that sentence?) I can easily say, sure, nothing put on film can scare me any more than real life.  I have children, a husband, and other loved ones, and believe me, if you asked me to answer truthfully what scares me, it wouldn’t be a random zombie outbreak or a killer stalking teens.

Movies are escape.  That’s the name of the game.  Claiming “nothing scares me” certainly takes the life out of viewing horror, doesn’t it?

But I digress.

I haven’t laughed, cried and been scared by one film in a while.  That is to say, I’ve laughed at films, I’ve cried over films and I’ve been scared by films, but never all three in the course of an hour and a half.  Train to Busan is a zombie film ride I sort of wished wouldn’t end.  

The setup was great.  For those who haven’t seen it, I won’t spoil it, but I was like whoa….this is how this is going to go?  I rolled along with the cliched characterization, because, zombies.  In addition, the actors did so well, I didn’t care that I’d seen the same character in other movies.

Even in the scenes where I KNEW a character was going to do this or that (and there were a few, because, you know, film-watcher of a certain age and all..) but again, I was so caught up in what was going on that I did not care.

Grade A:  I literally laughed, cried and gasped in fear.  Highly recommended.

Train to Busan: Trailer

 

Here’s to watching horror movies in the morning!

Dahlia